Monday 6 August 2012

Internet Dating.















Tess said:
'I thought I should go there to see
If it was the answer for me.
The food was OK,
But the fellow was gay.
It happens with RSVP!'

.............

My gay friend Fred replied:
'Internet dating just sucks
It's aimed at the straight does and bucks.
But most of my friends
Are girls. It depends
On what you are looking for, Ducks!'

..................

PS. Retraction.
RSVP does cater for all permutations of sexual combinations.

...................

More successful romantic adventures can be found at Magpie Tales.

47 comments:

  1. Yes witty Bruce but with a nasty sting. Tells you more about the author than about Tess. Blaming GAYS and RSVP for his stuff is not the nice bloke we thought he was. Not impressed with this post.

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    1. Sorry you were offended. I thought I had covered that with the 'Retraction'. Sigh!

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    2. Some folk refuse to be apologised to, Stafford. It's called bigotry.

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    3. 'Anonymous' obviously doesn't know you Stafford.

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    4. Wrong on this comment Sue. And Doc Whoeveryouare, your comment made me ***laff n laff***

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  2. i am rather glad that i missed out on the whole internet dating scene...regardless of sexual orientation...

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    1. Approached with honesty, it is a way of widening one's horizons. I have tried it and met some wonderful people.

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  3. Me too. But I do know some terrific people who have met that way and it has worked. It's all about honesty and no emotional baggage I'm told.

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  4. Yeah, i wouldn't do internet dating either. However I know someone who has and was lucky. dating like that is like writing a best seller I guest. So, weather just rough it by going out and experiencing. Like this.

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  5. As a full-time carer of a spouse whose brain is deteriorating, I find it bizarre that anyone who has only themself to worry about should want to complicate life by searching for a partner. Unfortunately that's what years of being a carer has done to me: make me crave solitude and lack of responsibility as desirable states. I'm sure I'd view every potential new partner as someone I might need to care for in the future. A sad state to be in, but there you are.

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    1. Being a full time carer takes all one's hours and almost all one's energy. It also invites depression, so dear Chartreuse, it is no wonder you feel that way. But... when you are, and if ever you are free, after a while, all changes. It is a bit like childbirth. If any mother really remembered the birth of the first, there would never be a second! :-)

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    2. Yes, I'm sure you're right, Stafford. I had only one child (though not for that reason) and just recently when I became a grandmother I found myself really sad that I never had more kids. They are so wonderful!

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    3. What a lovely exchange. I send Chartreuse a hug.

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  6. I just thought; Interesting that what was meant to be a bit of fun has morphed into a serious discussion of Internet Dating! Great!

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  7. Good to see discourse here and great to see how you handle all these comments, Stafford. You are still my number one dose of sunshine.

    As we are able to make fun of ourselves, we make fun of friends and those closest to us. If we have to tip toe all the time among friends, that is not a very honest relationship. Cheers, everyone!

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  8. Very clever Stafford (and informative)

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    1. Thanks Jane, but I expected more information from you! Haha!

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  9. Two more excellent limericks, Stafford. Thanks.

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  10. Limericks! Hahaha - great minds...? Funny stuff Stafford.

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  11. See Tess that's what you get for having dinner in a dimly-lit room. Well I thought this piece was very funny, but it was meant to be wasn't it? Since we're commenting on internet dating; without it I wouldn't have my darling grandchildren and lovely daughter-in-law.

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    1. Thank you Nell, of course it was meant to be funny and that is all it was meant to be. And, thank goodness, Tess is up to being used as a character. I simply took the body language as the cue. She looks bored and he has his legs crossed!

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    2. Oh, and, except for schools and the workplace, where else can people find a partner? The night scene in clubs and pubs, at least here, has changed to be where one would not be looking! We used to go dancing with friends and I well remember the progressive barn dance, where one got to see and touch all those interesting others in a safe environment. That beats screens and bios any day!

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    3. A barn dance sounds like so much fun!

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  12. Replies
    1. Who me!? (looking bashful and averting eyes in feigned innocence). You can tell I have been editing plays.

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  13. Oh yes the wild world of any kind of dating anywhere you go....but if we don't first try we will never know right! You are so witty!

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  14. Thanks Karen, dating is a game fraught with danger and embarrassment no matter where it is played. But we all go there, and many try again and a gain. It's in the genes, thank Darwin!

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  15. The reference to gay people and dating caused me to wonder about that added complications gay people face in seeking a partner and how that can be used in politics. See next blog.

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  16. Loved this and your post above.

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  17. Rather proves that everybody loves lady friends, regardless!! Ha ha. :)

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    1. You are right. Through the years in show biz, I noticed many very beautiful women had gay men as friends. I never asked, but one volunteered the reason. Straight men seem not interested in getting to know her but gay men do.

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    2. My gay men friends ADORE me ... and I LOVE it!!

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  18. Great limericks Stafford- your blog is wonderful!
    Many decades ago I met my husband using "personal ads" in a local paper- there were many headings: Men Seeking Women, Women Seeking Men, Men Seeking Men, Women Seeking Women and so forth.
    My husband wrote his first ad- I responded to his ad- never having responding to an ad before....and the rest is history! It was serendipity and luck.

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    1. Almost ten years ago, my youngest persuaded me to check out the ads for Women seeking Men and I answered two ads. The first was sad. I arranged to meet her for coffee, as you do, and she had tried so hard to look her best, but she just wasn't for me and we both knew it right away. But we had coffee and spent a pleasant hour chatting before we parted.
      The second was something else entirely.
      I called and left a message, then went to a gig, where I turned off the phone.
      When I turned it on, there was a message from Munya. Munya sounded like the worst imaginable Bergen Belsen guard, with thick guttural accent that demanded to know why I had not called again. "Why you not call again!?"
      It was by then a bit late so I decided I would call in the morning, but later that night the phone rang and it was her. "Why you not call!?" I explained I had been at a gig. "You got good job!?" 'Well', I said. I had a few part time gigs but was basically retired. "You got kids!?"
      Sorry about the exclamation marks, but she barked exclamations. "Yes, four kids, six grandkids..." She cut me off. "No good to me! No good to me!"
      I swear I did not laugh, but I came close, as I said as gently as I could, 'You're right. I am no good for you.' and hung up.

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  19. Ah, I so enjoyed reading it all - you may want to charge me rent. I've been here for a long time. :) And enjoyed every bit of it.

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    1. It would be uncharacteristic of me to say anything as soppy as: 'Your enjoyment is rent enough'. So, although I might think it, I would never say it, of course.

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  20. It's 4.15 am, and having been awake since 1.30 am, the night has escaped me, let alone sleep!!! I came down to the computer in desperation for some light relief after staring at the ceiling so long, and have had a fine old time reading your Mag, comments and replies. Thank you so much for the unexpected entertainment!

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    1. I am sorry to tell you Jinksy, that laughter wakes you up!

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  21. Having just gone through 15 years of parents losing their mates, remarrying and their spouses passing on and then having them pass on, ending with my husband passing on two years ago, I fully understand where Chartreuse has journeyed. I crave a quiet solitude with just myself to worry about, no parents, no mates. Such thought provoking limericks, Stafford! Thank you. =D

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    1. I am surprised but glad that my intention of provoking a smile has resulted in such a surge of thought and feeling.
      I feel a bit like you do right now Linda, after a string of recent losses.

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