Friday, 25 June 2010

Quit while you're a toothbrush..

When I was young I cleaned the teeth of little boys and girls.
I kept their molars squeaky clean, incisors bright as pearls.
But now I’m old I’m given only yukky things to do,
Like ridding tiles of mould and grime and clots of birdie poo.

“You think that’s bad!” said Toilet Brush, in tones of fear and dread.
“You should see the mess they make and where they put my head!”
So now when I’m unhappy and my life I would amend,
I think of poor old Toilet Brush, all flushed and round the bend.

The end.

Inspired by Magpie Tales


  1. ZOMG. You're on a roll. This is just too funny.

  2. Pure and utter delight ... your Magpie!

  3. i just hate it when someone's having a pity party and another one trumps his story..seriously this magpie is absolutely "charmin"

  4. Bravo, I agree - would not want my head in a toilet bowl....bkm

  5. This should be in a children's book somewhere.
    Cute. Charming. Cheery!

  6. hahaha Thoroughly enjoyed.

    (I'd be lost without my "cleaning" toothbrush.)

  7. you write the BEST and funniest little poems! Ahahahahahhahaha

  8. Been away. Thanks Selma and Helen for your support and so glad you get a laugh out of me being silly. I could become addicted!
    Soundoffreedom, I really did shed a tear reading your story. I recommend it.
    signedbkm, Hate to say this, but it seems it was not a 'brush with fame', more like 'fame with brush!'
    CC, I read your past few Grumpy Old women posts and joined your gang. Right age group and temperament.
    ninotaziz, point me at a publisher!
    meleah rebeccah, Thanks again. IXL, my 'significant other' says I am being channelled! I remind her a channel is very like a drain.

  9. oooH couplets!
    I never would have thought this of you
    good job

  10. As always an enjoyment to read anything that you write. You bring a smile to my face. :-)
    So for that I will make sure my teeth are squeaky clean. Awesome Magpie! :-)

  11. Couplets, triplets, I'm OK right up to tentuplets then it's shoes off! Thanks Suz.
    Carrie, I cannot imagine you any other way!

  12. This is hilarious and absolutely charming, it read like the best comic verse should; with rhythm, pace, humour and joy :D

  13. Very funny, love it. Everytime I use my toilet brush now I'm going to feel guilty.

    Thanks so much for leaving a comment on my post.
    And yes you are correct, Jeff was never told...
    As for "husband Abuse" please spare me..
    I've had to deal with Man Flu in my house this weel

  14. Oh how that gave me a much-needed belly-laugh.
    Thank you!

  15. If I had to be one or the other, I'd choose the lesser of two evils.

  16. Bwahahahaha - yes, as Selma says, you are on a roll.

  17. Love this!

    All those little brushes we take for granted. The torture we put them through. Poor old toothbrushes bundled under the sink, long past their intended use, but standing in a container ready for service no matter how disgusting.

  18. Aww, poor old toilet brush, loved this, I am enjoying my first trip around the Magpie tale-tellers.

  19. love it love it...once again I am laughing my head off.....hahhaah

  20. I'm still laughing, but I'm going to reread this all just to keep the laughter going! Love it.

  21. Good one, Stafford. It made me laugh.

  22. Bravo! You made me laugh out loud. And when I read it to my husband, he laughed too. Really good.

  23. It could be worse...
    Nice one!

  24. great rythm and pace, your magpies are always so delightful, I love reading them!

  25. You wrote the most fun and delightful magpie I've encountered thus far! I love it.

  26. Oh, I have a horrible story involving a "toilet brush." Let's just say I no longer leave my real toothbrush out in the open.

    Loved the piece.

  27. The Big Question Is :
    Are the Bristles on this Brush
    In the Court of King Caractacus ?
    If so are they:
    * Just Brushing By *
    * Just Scraping Through *
    Depends on ' Who is Really Who '
    For a Brush With a ' Royal Flush '
    On Teeth or a Lavvy Loo
    Never Matters if the Brush Belongs
    To 'The King or The Queen of ' YOU '

    ** Chin Up or Bum Up *
    Just Another ' Brush With Reality ', I'd Say ....


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