Fishing: You want to fish more? Don’t worry, I’ll create more fisheries!
Mining: You don’t want to pay? Don’t worry. No tax and I’ll create endless resource access!
Business: You want to pay lower wages? Don’t worry, I’ll create a bottomless labour pool.
Climate change: It’s bunkum. Don’t worry, I’ll make sure it’s business as usual.
Mothers: Paid maternity leave? Don’t worry, I’ll pay wealthy women three grand a week for six months. Working women? 'Over my dead body'. Don’t worry, they don’t vote for me anyway.
Asylum seekers: Desperate people on leaky bloats? Don’t worry, I will personally ‘turn back the boats’ but keep the well dressed ones that come by plane.
Global economic crisis: Don’t worry. It never happened.
Broadband: You want it on the cheap? Don’t worry, I’m working on a pedal wireless version.
Policies: Trust me, I’m a grown-up. My promises are all fully costed by a bloke I paid to say it. Vote for me.
Sigh!
Pic. Pedal wireless. Australian outback
And I join your sigh. You wittily and very powerfully detail the flaws and hypocrisies of the world we live in. I despair.
ReplyDeleteYou are in count-down mode now Stafford. The World is watching ...........
ReplyDeleteHey Ford, we are having an election party on Saturday night. Wanna come? You have to come dressed as a pollie or a political slogan. But you can't come wearing ears 'cos my bloke has already taken Mr Rabbit.
ReplyDeleteNaturement I shall be rootin' for the knitt'n party.
May all the * Fleas * in Australia * Rise Up * and bite a certain * Budgie * tomorrow...
ReplyDeleteMay all the * Greedy Cheats and Crooks * feel the * Itch * as well..
I'm getting nervous :( - great post by the way Stafford - you're a champion,
ReplyDeleteThere can be nothing but the sigh..........enjoyed the post.
ReplyDeleteKeeping my fingers crossed for your parties victory!
ReplyDeletefrom handing out pamphlets to writing poetry to dead on slogans, you are a talented fellow!
You hang in there today, Stafford. And remember, there are people out there like me who share your views. We are all in this together. It ain't over, till it's over!!
ReplyDeleteI do hope Phoney Rabbit doesn't win and we get more of the 'Howard' treatment. I'm waiting to see him standing in the ocean doing his King Knut with the boats. Is he going to stop them coming with a boat hook? He should seek out the other 98% who never went home after their holiday! Fingers crossed, and eyes and legs, that common sense wins out.
ReplyDeleteYou make us smile, even when it is serious issues! Hope you have a great weekend! :-)
ReplyDeleteIm a mother! Now how can I collect three grand a week for six months??? Ahahahahhahahahahahha
ReplyDelete